Ugh, the reasons I hate Bon Jovi just seem to grow. I just went on NPR.org to get the transcript for the Bon Jovi interview I heard last night on Fresh Air and they haven’t posted the audio due to “contractual obligations.” It’s like Bon Jovi doesn’t WANT me to write about why I hate him so much with the help of his own quotes.
Well I’m going to forge ahead anyway.
Bon Jovi has a new album, “Circle” and I haven’t listened to it, nor do I ever intend to, but I heard two of the songs last night, and… well lets just do a comparison study. First, off the new record, “We Weren’t Born to Follow”:
Could it be any more blue collar? Pictures of firefighters? Is that 9/11? The Berlin wall? Lance Armstrong? WTF is going on in this video. Not to mention it’s only a few notes away from this:
And as if that wasn’t blue collar enough for you, there’s “Work For the Working Man”:
Which is only ONE NOTE away from this:
Ok, so what, right? They know their product, they know what riffs have worked in the past, they know what stories get their fans’ blood up, why fix what isn’t broken. They had the highest grossing tour last year.Â And this new album, “Circle,” debuted at Â #1.Â Numbers don’t lie. And, just with full disclosure, I love a good round of “Living on a Prayer” blasted at my local watering hole.
What bothers me so much is what an unbelievable prick Jon Bon Jovi is. I’ve watched the documentary that came out with this album, When We Were Beautiful (check out the trailer here), as well as this interview I heard last night, and it’s stunning how ungrateful he sounds. The documentary is non-stop whining. Whining about having to be on the road for three weeks at a time. Whining about having to play in front of 70,000 people and then go back to a hotel room. Whining, while being loosened up by his personal masseuse, that everyone only wants to hear “Living on a Prayer” instead of all the ballads he’s written over the years. He is so fundamentally NOT blue collar that his songs are offensive.
He even admits he never worked a blue collar day in his life. It’s one thing to write these songs in the 80s, and I don’t knock him for it, but to continue to peddle the same patronizing drivel to a working class he so blatantly mocks is shameful.
Just play the hits, Jon, and shut up, before your legacy is so muddled you have to go back to playing mid-sized club shows.