Death in the Family

Filed in Gather Family Essential by on December 12, 2011 0 Comments

tried to post this last night but couldn’t get logged on.

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This has been a week of trials to say the least. Dad’s brother (Uncle Jack) finding out he has colon cancer and having surgery. And now tonight, even worse news.

Mother’s brother (Uncle Jerry) passed away around 6pm of a massive heart attack. 52 years old. Total shock. We knew he had heart problems, but not to this extent. He had a stint put in a few months ago and that was supposed to take care of everything. He leaves behind 2 boys (21 and 20) a daugher-in-law (20) and a grandson who is almost a year. His mother will be 87 New Years day and then mom and 5 other brothers – one is a twin.

Things are very stressful right now especially for grandma (will be 87 on New Years Day) and his 2 boys. My mom is taking it pretty hard too. She practically raised him and his twin the first 5 years of their lives.

He colasped after taking a shower at Grandma’s. He walked outside to get air. He was saying he was having a hard time breathing. Two of his brothers and a friend tried CPR till the ambulance arrived. When they got there, they used the paddles and brought him back for a few min, but he died again just a block down the road. He was already blue when the brothers were trying to do CPR (they didn’t know what they were doing), just blowing in his mouth and pounding on his chest. They were drunk/smoking too. They were just doing the best they could. He died in the arms of his twin brother.

Jerry came into the world holding on to Terry and he left with Terry holding him.

Mom was saying tonight that she has always said that she has had 6 brothers, but now she only has 5. I told her no, she still has 6 brothers no matter what. One has just gone on before the rest of them.

Will keep you posted as more news comes. Gonna to be helping mom and grandma with funeral prep. I know there are other brothers but each has their own opinions, so it was voted that Grandma and Mom would handle things (imput from others, but theirs were the final say). I will deal with the insurance, bank, and social security. And also help his 2 sons in knowing what to do next. I was a 2nd mom to these boys for several years when their mom left. I did all the PTA meetings, dr appts, etc. I have to be there for them now. This is the most difficult time of their lives. I can’t image the pain they are going through and my heart breaks for them.

As I think of what they are going though, I think about what it would be to loose my mom or dad. I honestly don’t know what I would do. I can’t imagine life without them – even with our ups and down and arguements. That is what makes us “family”. I can’t imagine Elijah not knowing his Papa or Gramdma or having just these few years of memories. This is the closest death has come in a while. Even when my dad lost his sisters and brother it wasn’t as painful. They had a long life and their death came after many years of battling cancer. In a way, it was almost a relief that their suffering was over.

The last death that really broke me was when my grandma died in 97. I was close to her. It was probably a year before I could even look at a picture of her without crying. If someone mentioned her name, my lips would start quivering and I would have to look away. It was hard for me when I lost my Aunt Sharleene on dad’s side too, but I buried myself in work at the church to distract myself.  I didn’t let myself have time to grieve.  It was probably 4 months later before I finally grieved for her death. 

Just keep us in prayer please. For strenght, for peace, for peace in the family, for agreement in the funeral plans, comfort for all who cared for Uncle Jerry, and for those in our family who don’t know Christ Jesus as Savior – that this will be the event that will cause them to seek Him and finally make that decision

I remember back in June 96 talking to Uncle Jerry on the phone. I had just finished talking with Tracey and Matt. Jerry asked me some questions about Scripture, being baptized, and being saved. I don’t remember the date off hand, but that afternoon, standing in my bed room looking out the window, I prayed the prayer of salvation with Uncle Jerry. Then on July 28, 1996, he, Tracey, Matt, and Grandma were water baptized

About the Author ()

First of all, I am a Christian who loves God with everything in me. My passion is to see others come to know Jesus and find freedom in Him.2ndly, I am a single mom of a little boy whom I adopted at birth. He is now 3 years old and the joy of my l

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