Doug’s Guide to the Fall Season’s New Shows

Filed in Gather Writing Essential by on November 9, 2011 0 Comments

Doug’s Fall TV Preview

Television continues to push the envelope.  The padded envelope.  Here are capsule previews of the new fall shows coming to your 85 inch plasma screen.

Desperate Housekeepers of Orange County, 90212

Watch through our hidden cameras as illegal immigrant maids and nannies filch jewelry, goof off, deal drugs out of strollers, and blackmail their employers.  Host Eva Longoria.

Landfill Pickers

Mike Wolfe and Frank Fritz, having cleaned out every garage, barn, and attic in the Western Hemisphere, take you along live on their adventures picking the greatest landfills in the United States.  Premiere episode features the New York City Garbage Scow.

Cooking with Ramen

Top Ramen isn’t just for college students anymore!  Wolfgang Puck and Pee Wee Herman host this exciting recipe competition and cooking demonstration show live from Wong’s Noodle Shack on the grounds of the Washoe County Fair.

Las Vegas Laundromat

In the City That Never Sleeps, laundromats are open 24 hours a day!  Watch colorful characters pour thousands of coins into huge machines.  With host Louie Anderson.

Decorating with Lunch Meat

Martha Stewart shows you how to make marvelous holiday craft projects out of pimento loaf.

Extreme Hobo Camp Makeover

Join Bill O’Reilly as he interviews (via remote satellite link, of course) homeless families living under bridges and gives them a virtual pat on the head.

This Old Tool Shed

In this successor to the runaway hit This Old Dog House, host Bob Vila will share with you the subtle esthetics of working with corrugated steel.

Paranormal Plush Toys

Dan Aykroyd takes you into the lives of people who get messages from their teddy bears.

Beachcombing with Bob

Dateline NBC takes its hidden cameras to the beach at low tide and catches unsuspecting citizens furtively skimming the shoreline for sand dollars.

World Checkers Championship

Dave Foley takes you behind the scenes at the largest gathering of checker players in the world, with hundreds of dollars at stake, direct from St. Agatha’s Assisted Living Village in Peoria, Illinois.

World’s Dumbest Obituaries

Join Alan Thicke and Steve Gutenberg as they read the hysterical viewer-submitted gaffes, misprints, malaprops, and faux pas from obituaries all over the world.

Forensic Accounting Files

The show that makes double entry bookkeeping sexy.  Fearless investigators risk writers cramp looking for skullduggery hidden in the numbers.  Hosted by Bernie Madoff and Donald Trump.

Biggest Zit Loser

Trainers Katy Perry and Justin Bieber work with teams of contestants isolated from their families and sequestered at the Proactiv Acne-Clearing Resort and Spa in Puerto Vallarta.  Half-naked acne sufferers display their zits and blackheads and those who lose the fewest number of pimples risk being voted off the farm.  Thrill to the contrived suspense and root for your favorites.

Gopher Hunt

A shameless recycling of the long-running hit Sea Hunt.  Hysterical hijinks involving garden hoses, smoke bombs, backhoes, and TNT.  Starring Beau Bridges and Rodney Dangerfield.

Survivor:  Lake Michigan Coal Barge

Scantily clad beautiful people live by their wits under the harshest conditions and learn how to work with each other.  Creative physical and survival challenges, shifting alliances, and death-defying suspense.  Follow us on Twitter to vote on who gets kicked off the barge.  With Raquel Welch and Daryl Hannah.

Segway X-Games

Hosted by Peter Gabriel and Tony Hawk, watch the most daring athletes in the world brave halfpipes, moguls, and BMX courses with only their skill and two wheels separating them from catastrophic injury!

Missing and Presumed Misplaced

Ever lose your keys, find them, and wonder how they got there?  Host Morgan Freeman shows us how quantum uncertainty affects our daily lives.

About the Author ()

57 year old musician, poet, father of 4 grown children, composer, recording artist, author, humorist, survivor. I'm thoughtful, introspective, introverted, open, scathingly honest about myself, creative, a Renaissance guy, willing to grow and change and

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