The season finale of GCB opens with the ladies being kidnapped. What happened? Well, earlier that day…
Carlene calls up Cricket. She wants to borrow Cricket’s jet because Ripp took theirs to Denver for some business. Carlene asks Sharon and Cricket along to her Condos for Christian Living Condos. Cricket says no, but Sharon and Heather, who will be handling the sales, agree. Sharon wants to go down to Mexico to check on the people who are making her baskets. She found a basket that was completely unacceptable (gaping hole in the bottom), and wants to talk about the quality control. Zach comes along. He is in talks with a company that wants to buy Losing with Jesus. Sharon is uninterested because she is having a great time being a businesswoman.
Cricket also decides to go when Mason (Grant Bowler) continues to stalk her. He is slightly obsessed with her it seems. He happens to meet Blake when he shows up at the office. Something makes Mason suspicious. He has a ranch and his new foreman is Blake’s old one. While Cricket is down in Mexico, Mason shows up at the office and lets Blake know that he knows.
Pastor Tudor begs Amanda to go to Mexico after Carlene browbeats and sugar talks (she really did do both) him into going down to bless the groundbreaking. When he tries to beg off because he is preparing this week’s sermon on the book of Revelations, she told him that no one understands it, plus by the time all that comes to pass, everyone will be long gone. Amanda tells him no because she is going to Austin to see Luke (Eric Winter). She wavers because Pastor Tudor never asks for favors but Gigi shows up and tells her that she’ll go along, and sends her off to Austin.
When Amanda arrives in Austin, she is stunned to find his door opened by a woman and a baby. Her relief that she is a neighbor is short-lived when she realizes that he is not in Austin but in Juarez. The lies bring her to a bad place because of her dead husband.
Amanda invites herself along to the Juarez trip, but Carlene makes her welcome when she tells her that she will consider buying a condo. She tells her mom that Luke is not in Austin as he had told her. She and Gigi show up at the address the neighbor gave her. Amanda peeks into the window and catches Ripp hugging a beautiful, tall, young woman. Amanda gasps and hides. Gigi demands a lift so she can see and when she does she is shocked. Inside, Ripp cryptically tells Lucia (Anabelle Acosta) that he doesn’t want to hurt Carlene.
Carlene, Cricket, Heather and Sharon visit a local woman’s shop. The woman (Yolanda Delarosa) tells them that she can only make a few bottles at a time which drives up the cost. Sharon says she thinks she wants to bring it to the states. Cricket scoffs at the idea. They all grab bottles when the woman, who looks amazing and to be in her late 30s, reveals herself to be 62.
After the groundbreaking, the woman go in the limo Carlene hired while Pastor Tudor begs to ride with Zach. Sharon overhears Cricket talking to someone about the face cream. She is incensed that Cricket is trying to steal her idea. The limo does not take them back to town but deep in the desert. Which brings the story back to the beginning.
Cricket tells Heather to seduce the man into letting them go, but it turns out he’s gay. She takes over and offers him beautiful luggage. He agrees but then Debbie Horowitz (Sandra Bernhard) walks in and puts a stop to it. She wants to reclaim the land for her people. She is one eighth Native American. Carlene refuses, much to everyone’s dismay. Carlene always wanted to be a martyr. The others aren’t interested in joining her and tell Debbie that Carlene has the deed in her purse. Debbie grabs it and leaves the woman in the trailer. The doors are open but Debbie and the men take their cells and the limo.
The women set off towards town. They walk and walk on their 4″ heels. They have no food and no water. Sharon does have a bottle of tequila and they all share it, except for Amanda who is an alcoholic. Gigi finally makes Amanda take a drink.
Amanda tells Carlene about Ripp. Carlene doesn’t believe her until Gigi corroborates it. Carlene collapses. Gigi tells Amanda that maybe next time she’ll listen to her mama and wait to tell this kind of news until they’ve reached their destination.
They arrive back at the groundbreaking and Gigi uses a bottle of hairspray and her gun to set the billboard on fire. This alerts Pastor Tudor and Zach who have been searching for them. Pastor Tudor shows off some of his military skills, completely impressing Zach. When they find the women, Zach tells Sharon that he sold the company to a diet company. When Cricket overhears, she tells them that that’s her company, well, a subsidiary of one of her companies. Sharon and Zach look less than thrilled.
Amanda, Gigi and Carlene go back to that house. Lucia opens the door. Carlene is dismayed at how tall she is. Ripp tells her that Lucia is his 22-year-old daughter. Carlene goes inside to talk with him.
Luke tries to explain, but Amanda realizes she has to think. She goes to a bar, but doesn’t drink. Pastor Tudor finds her. They talk about his knight in shining armor complex and then he grabs her and they kiss. She kisses him back before breaking it off. They both look shocked.
And that it’s for the first season of GCB! If the show is renewed there are a lot of story threads to be woven.