I was reading an article in a women's magazine talking about how marriage is dying because the studies say it's so. According to the census figures analyzed by The New York Times, married couples, whose numbers have been declining for decades, have finally slipped into the minority. While it may seem like you can't find any single friends to go bar crawling with, chances are a small minority of all those couples you know aren't married and probably won't be in the future.
I personally feel that marriage is nice for some people, but not the end all, be all for happy coupling everywhere. I come from Parents who have been married for 52 years this year and an old fashioned Spanish/Catholic family with all of the supposed traditions from ions ago, but I know that marriage is not for me. I have all of the benefits here in the state of Texas that I would have were I married and had that certificate that would signify it.
Sure, marriage makes sense for a lot of people from an economic perspective – tax incentives and all that. And for others, marriage is a really romantic notion, one in which brings the couple together in order to procreate. Ideally I suppose that should be the way that it is but these days it just isn't. I know that there are women and men that do exist that have been planning their weddings since the day they emerged from their Mom's uterus, I just don't know any of them anymore.
Another reason marriage is dying? Because divorce is much more popular. Seriously, people are embracing divorce with more vim and vigor than marriage these days – and studies show that divorce benefits men in the end. Contrary to the popular myth that women take men for all of their worth in divorce settlements, a new study has shown that men actually benefit financially after a divorce! Getting un-married makes men richer. So why get married in the first place?
All of this does not say, however, that monogamy is dying. On the contrary, many long – lasting relationships are between couples who never tie the knot. Do those relationships have more longevity than married relationships because there's something about wedded bliss that isn't so blissful? I have personally been co-habitating with the same man now for over eight years and we are comfortable the way that we are. Here in Texas we are considered common law married if we pay bills as a couple or have both names on property along with other different factors. We don't need anyone to give us a certificate to make us more of a couple or more responsible or respectful towards each other. I think that it is a matter of attitude about the relationship, the depth of commitment, is perhaps different for some. Some don't feel as if they are tied down with that little piece of paper. Personally to me, I like the freedom of just being able to say that I'm not married or the jinx that marriage has brought to my life two times before; (twice bitten, twice shy) – and that wasn't going to change regardless of whether we had a traditional marriage or not. I do believe that I would have thought differently had we had children.
Perhaps more people are opting out of marriage because of lack of commitment , and because they don't think marriage to be the ultimate symbol of commitment. The fact that people are considering what commitment truly means, rather than going along with tradition for tradition's sake, is a good thing in my humble opinion.
What do YOU think?