… and I'm so nervous about it! I plan on trying to go to bed early tonight so I won't have to think about it anymore. First thing in the morning I plan on calling the circuit court to try to get some information so I'll KNOW why I need to go in.
Let me take you back to June 2003. My ex boyfriend was extremely drunk and decided he'd threaten to kill me, my boyfriend (he's my husband now) and my oldest son. I called the police and I got a restraining order on him the very next day. The next few years were filled with supervised visits, lawyers, court appearances, lots and lots of stress, a parenting study and then finally papers were signed and I was given full custody of our son. We agreed on a child support amount of $325 a month and he was able to see Alex IF he completed some requirements first. They told him he needed to go through drug & alcohol classes, have random ua's done and complete a domestic violence course. While he was doing those things, he could see Alex at supervised visits a few hours a week and as long as he continued to do the court ordered things then his visitation would gradually work up to every other weekend, unsupervised.
The thing is, he never did anything to see his son! For years there has been no contact from Ray but every year in June I go down and get that restraining order renewed. This year though, I decided to let it lapse. Partly because by the time I remembered to renew it, it was too late and partly because I gave him the benefit of the doubt and felt that if he's made no attempt for years to contact us then there would be no reason for him to do so now. I didn't think anything about any of this until today when I opened my mail and saw this:
IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE STATE OF OREGON FOR MARION COUNTY
February 10th, 2009
Lopez Raymond / Colombi Faith
Case #xxxxxx Domestic Relations Petition for Custody
NOTICE OF SCHEDULED COURT PROCEEDING
Hearing Status Check
Failure to appear at the court event indicated above at the time and place specified may result in an order being rendered against you in this case.
CC: Raymond Lopez
Now my head is swimming! Did he decide after all this time to request a modification in the child support amount? If so… he's got a surprise coming because when the order was first established I was working full time, paying for daycare and providing health coverage for Alex so if he asks for a modification in support based on my income… they will more than likely INCREASE it since I don't work now.
Has he finally decided to complete all the court ordered things because he wants to see Alex? If so that sure is going to be weird! Alex hasn't seen him since he was 2 yrs old and that was over 5 years ago! He doesn't even know the guy… wow, that will be quite a change for all of us.
Maybe he smartened up and decided to give up his parental rights? Oh my gosh, if that is the case I would be SO happy! All we've ever wanted is for him to be out of our lives…
So, what do you think it could be about? After all this time… court papers were finalized and signed years ago. Is this something routine?
Wish me luck please – I really do need it right now. I'll post an update once I get in touch with them in the morning. I really hope they can at least tell me what this status hearing is for so I can stop obsessing over it.