Jonathan Knight Gay Lover Disaster

Filed in Gather News Channel by on February 5, 2009 0 Comments

Poor Jonathan Knight; exboyfriends have to be the worst (so I hear anyways). It’s bad enough Jonathan Knight was in New Kids on the Block – people have to wonder if he’s gay based on that alone. But now male model Kyle Wilker erased all doubt by having the National Enquirer buy the story of their relationship.

But since Seinfeld taught me there’s nothing wrong with being gay, Jonathan Knight should not be bothered by these rumors. What he should be bothered by is his ex’s selling of their relationship to the National Enquirer. I’ve had plenty of relationships that ended bad and all, but if my ex sold me out to a magazine (and don’t think it hasn’t come up) I would straight out kill her. Seriously, they wouldn’t even find the body. Not in one piece at least.

Because I’ve never been in the same situation as Jonathan Knight, what happens now? Since Jonathan Knight and Kyle Wilker are both dudes, can they settle this with a fist-fight? I mean, I figure this is the whole selling point for being gay in the first place – you can actually hit your significant other because you’re the same gender, right? At least that’s how my "friend" pitched the whole gay experience to me as he plied me with drinks. And then there was some pill he gave me. After that… well, it’s a little hazy.

The next morning was a bit awkward too. But that’s not the point of this post. What I’m wondering is how does Jonathan Knight do now?

And as a secondary question:  Is anyone really surprised by a gay Jonathan Knight?  Does anyone even care? 

 

 

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Don't know what to say... I grew a beard once. It itched. The end.

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