In the most ridonkulous celebrity news of the day, Lindsay Lohan is suing E*Trade for allegedly using her name and image without her permission in one of their famous baby commercials that first took place during the Super Bowl.Â In the ad (featured below), the baby boy is shown apologizing to his baby girlfriend for not calling the night before.Â The New York Post goes into the commercial details and the lame reasoning behind the lawsuit:
“And that milkaholic Lindsay wasn’t over?” the baby girl asks him suspiciously.
“Lindsay?” the boy replies, just before a baby girl sticks her head into the frame and slurs, “Milk-a-what?”
Lohan’s lawyer, Stephanie Ovadia, said the actress has the same single-name recognition as Oprah or Madonna.
“Many celebrities are known by one name only, and E-Trade is using that knowledge to profit,” Ovadia said.
“They used the name Lindsay,” Ovadia said. “They’re using her name as a parody of her life. Why didn’t they use the name Susan? This is a subliminal message. Everybody’s talking about it and saying it’s Lindsay Lohan.”
Here’s the first thing – the only one-word nickname anyone knows you by is “skank”.Â And here’s the other thing – no one was actually talking about this until you two douches decided to come up with the lame-brained scheme to make Li-Lo some money.Â In fact, I’m frankly embarrassed that they not only compare Lindsay to the likes of Oprah or Madonna, but they’re the ones tying the “milkaholic” reference to the obviously effed-up Lindsay.Â The only way anyone would believe it’s Lindsay is if they had the baby lying in a pile of its own feces with a lit cigarette dangling from its tiny fingers and an empty bottle of vodka on the floor.Â Here’s the most ludicrous part – they want $100 million for Lohan’s “pain and suffering.”Â The members of the public should file a class action suit against Lindsay for pain and suffering for having to look at that wrinkled, overly-spray-tanned oompa loompa face.Â Now beat it.