Simon Cowell Hangs ‘Em Up–He’s Leaving American Idol in 2011

Simon Cowell (below) announced that he will be leaving American Idol at the end of this season to concentrate on another faux talent contest TV show called The X Factor. It’s going to be an American version of the British TV show by the same name that Cowell produces.  When asked if Paula Abdul would be a judge on the retread of the British show, Cowell remarked “I adore Paula. Whatever happens, I will be working with her in some capacity. Because I miss her.”

Cowell made his fortune with faux talent.  Before talent shows he was best known for the invention and marketing of the Spice Girls.  Certainly his adoration for washed up pop star Paula Abdul (left), the mom character on American Idol, has to do with her abundance of faux talent.  Abdul parleyed an almost nonexistent singing voice and modest dance ability into a cometary spell of pop stardom in the ’90s.

Here at NNN we’re looking forward to Cowell’s latest repackaging of British D list reality TV as further demonstration of the old adage that no one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the human race, in particular the US strain.  We can hardly wait to hear Cowell savage poor deluded people who are devoid of any ability to entertain others.  It’s been really fun to hear Cowell tell it like it is.  Mos def.

The question NNN staffers are asking most frequently is “Where are Alexander Woolcott and Dorothy Parker when we need them?  Why do we have to put up with third rate intellects using recycled gags?  America deserves better.”

 

 

Below a picture of Paula Abdul entertaining at home.

 

 

 

 

 

Below, pictures of Butterbeans and Susie and Emily Dickinson.  While neither of them ever appeared on American Idol they both had a great deal of talent and probably would have been thrown off by the judges before America got the chance to vote if they did enter the contest.

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